Catfish returned tonight with its season 2 premiere and boy, was it full of surprises. Well, not really. Max is still insistent on holding a camera that we never see footage of, Nev is still hairy chested, and we all know that these people are typically being lied to. If the guy on the other end of the line is pretending to be a buff bald black man, he’s most likely a skinny white boy or your white best friend you treat like a sister. Unfortunately for the victim of this Catfish, it was BOTH. To its credit, I didn’t exactly see that one coming. The writers got me on that one…oh, it’s all real? Okay, and Paula Deen isn’t racist. But despite this revelation, the real stand-out for the episode was its creator, Nev (pronounced Neev-yeah, it’s weird. Just call him Hairy Chest). Or more to the point, Nev’s hilarious one-liners. Whether intentional or not, Nev was on his a-game. Here’s a list of the best Nev quotes of the night…and one of Max’s.
1. “That’s what I call a frequent flyer!” Nev sees a bird in an airport and tries to be funny. Maybe next time, Nev.
2.”I would certainly want to make love to the person I was talking to before I married them.” Of course Nev would say “make love.” Obviously.
3. “Max, we know what we need to do…IMAGE SEARCH.” I felt like I was watching a cheesy old-school cartoon like Captain Planet where everyone would say at the same time “WITH OUR POWERS COMBINED…”
4. “One thing, I can tell you, is that I’m not going to sleep well tonight.” Really, Nev? THIS is gonna keep you up tonight?
5. “I’m really excited to just start digging into Steve.” This is Max’s. I knew he was gay.